As I get ready to close the door on 31, I can’t help but pause and wonder how I managed to keep putting one foot in front of the other some days. It was a hard year, but it was one of exponential personal growth.
It was the year I learned that my mental health and well being was essential to my overall health. When our head isn’t right, it’s hard for the body and spirit to follow. It took me time to find the importance here. There were many incredibly dark days that led the way, but the clarity I’ve gained since then – it’s been life changing.
I’ve learned to prioritize things differently; effectively removing the power I allowed others to have over my life; and most importantly – I learned that it was absolutely not selfish to put myself first, but in actual fact necessary. We cannot give our best to anyone or anything if we do not allow ourselves to be our best.
It’s been an eventful year. A heavy, heartbreaking one – but one I wouldn’t trade.
31 has allowed me to grow in so many ways – some I didn’t even know possible. It made me realize that it was okay for dreams to grow and change with me. It didn’t make me a quitter or failure, just simply a woman who has new dreams.
It has shown me with absolute certainty, that I have in fact found the love of my life. I have known for years that the love and relationship Vic and I have is different and unique. We are truly best friends, confidants, lovers and partners in life. We have experienced SO much together – good, bad, and the ugliest. And instead of it tearing us apart, it has made us stronger. I won’t lie and say we haven’t fought, said things out of frustration, or even screamed at each other if only because we’re each others only available outlet at the time. But we have mastered the art of forgiveness, understanding, and most of all acceptance. We know neither of us is perfect, but we love each other so much, that we provide whatever it is the other needs – no judgement.
So although 31 was painful, heartbreaking, and incredibly hurtful – it was also amazing, insightful, and refreshing.
I cannot wait to ring in 32 tomorrow.
Whatever it brings, I have a new-found strength to help take it on and the love of a man who I know I can count on with every breath.
Here’s to the next chapter . . .